Half & Half

Forgive me father for I know not what I do

Posted by Ami Kaufman on September 18, 2010 at 9:13 pm

Netanyahu’s Pravda — also known as Yisrael Hayom in some circles — let some public figures ask for forgiveness and repent on their paper ahead of Yom Kippur. I’ve chosen my three “favorites”.
The activist
Here’s what Arieh Eldad, a right wing extremist member of Knesset, had to say:

“I’d like to ask forgiveness from the citizens of Judea [...]


Tribe One and Tribe Two: From “proximity” to “direct”

Posted by Ami Kaufman on August 28, 2010 at 6:09 pm

(To fully enjoy, read the first episode of Tribe One and Tribe Two here)

Our first interlude -
I remember,
I do!
Concluded with hope for Tribe One and Tribe Two
The two showed that when they are willing,
They’re able
To even approach the negotiating table
But Oy!
Look what happened!
(Hold on to your socks)
They failed!
They trashed those proximity talks!
Wow, no one saw [...]


Reservoir Dogs: The most heated debate in Israel you probably never heard of

Posted by Ami Kaufman on August 26, 2010 at 1:33 pm

One of the most heated debates you’ve probably never heard of going on in Israel these days is over natural gas. Ever since reports began to surface on the huge reservoirs of gas off the coast of Israel, the discussion over who the it belongs to and how much money everybody is going to make [...]


Israeli’s Photos on Facebook Cause Uproar

Posted by Ami Kaufman on August 18, 2010 at 10:38 pm

An Israeli citizen has caused outrage after posting photos of himself smiling beside taped up boxes in a Facebook album called “The Best Move of My Life“.
Ami Kaufman, 37, who has been living in the posh northern Tel Aviv neighborhood of Bavli for the past two years with his wife and 2 daughters, was shown [...]


Was the Summer of 2009!

Posted by Ami Kaufman on August 17, 2010 at 12:04 am

Dedicated to Eden Abergil and those Best Years of Her Life
(play video and sing along with the brand new words for Bryan Adam’s mega-hit)

I got my first M-16
Got it and it felt real fine
Made me want to be an officer
Was the summer of 2009

Me and Shani from the unit
Hand cuffed some Arabs nice and hard
Fadi [...]


Izzie in HolyLand – Part 13

Posted by Ami Kaufman on August 12, 2010 at 9:58 am

The intercom buzzes outside of Izzie’s office in Jerusalem
Secretary: Yes, Ms. Holyland?
Izzie: Ruti, what’s on my schedule today?
Secretary: Ms. Holyland today you have to convince your cabinet to vote for deporting 400 children who were born in Israel, speak Hebrew with an Israeli accent, were educated here but were unfortunate to have slanted eyes.
Izzie: Gotcha. [...]


Chock Full o’ Racism

Posted by Ami Kaufman on August 11, 2010 at 9:58 am

I’ve been thinking a lot about racism lately.
During the past two weeks I’ve seen what some people might call “subtle” racism in Israel, but it seems to be so abundant that people feel free to blurt things out without any pangs of conscience whatsoever. And in my opinion, it’s not “subtle” at all to begin [...]


Diana, Elvis and BDS

Posted by Ami Kaufman on July 29, 2010 at 11:57 pm

It’s the night before her show in Israel, and Diana Krall has her suitcase at the door, ready to go to the airport.
Diana: OK Hun, I’m ready. The taxi’ll be here in a few minutes.
Elvis Costello: OK.
Diana: So, are you going to just sit there or are you going to come here and say goodbye?
Elvis [...]



Posted by Ami Kaufman on July 25, 2010 at 9:58 pm

A few weeks ago I went to the doctor. My throat was sore. Turns out I had strep. After he prescribed me some meds, he said: “By the way, I’d go check out some of those moles”.
I have a lot of moles. I inherited them. Throughout the years I had them checked, and some have [...]


The Top 10 IDF Dance Videos

Posted by Ami Kaufman on July 19, 2010 at 11:49 pm

Hey everybody!
This week we bring you Half & Half’s definitive list of IDF dance videos! Let’s see which group of boys or girls in green makes it to number one! (Some clips can only be seen on Youtube itself, so just click — and come back for more!)
Coming in at number 10 we’ve got some [...]