Izzie in Holyland

Izzie in HolyLand – Part 13

Posted by on August 12, 2010 at 9:58 am

Tweet Sunday The intercom buzzes outside of Izzie’s office in Jerusalem Secretary: Yes, Ms. Holyland? Izzie: Ruti, what’s on my schedule today? Secretary: Ms. Holyland today you have to convince your cabinet to vote for deporting 400 children who were born in Israel, speak Hebrew with an Israeli accent, were educated here but were unfortunate […]


Izzie in HolyLand – Part 12

Posted by on June 21, 2010 at 3:20 pm

Tweet Regev: Ms. Holyland, it’s time to go. Izzie: Shut up Mark, I know it’s time to go. Don’t push me around, it’s my ass they’re gonna grill out there – not yours. Regev: Sorry, Ms. Holyland. But look at it this way: we’re prepared. We have answers for everything. Just look at the papers […]


Izzie in HolyLand – Part 11

Posted by on May 19, 2010 at 12:06 am

Tweet Ring, ring! Izzie: Carlos? Santana: Si? Izzie: Carlos, it’s Izzie. What’s this I hear you cancelled your gig? Santana: Yeah, listen honey, we had a really tight schedule, and, it’s just, like, it just didn’t feel right, ya know, with the occupation and everything, you get my drift, right? Izzie: So why the fuck […]


Izzie in HolyLand – Part 10

Posted by on May 4, 2010 at 8:06 am

Tweet An elderly couple from White Plains, NY are visiting Israel, looking for property ahead of their long awaited aliyah. Their real estate agent is taking them to a luxury apartment in an exclusive project on a hilltop in southwest Jerusalem. They’re in the elevator. Agent: You’re going to love this apartment. I know you […]


Izzie in HolyLand – Part 9

Posted by on April 21, 2010 at 10:38 pm

Tweet (Ring-ring…) Ami: Hello? Izzie: Hi Ami, it’s Izzie. Ami: Izzie? Sorry, I don’t know any Izzie… Izzie: Of course you know an Izzie. You know, “Izzie in HolyLand”, that whole thing you do on your blog? Ami: Wait a minute. Are you telling me I’m talking to the Izzie that I created? Izzie: Well, […]


Izzie in HolyLand – Part 8

Posted by on April 7, 2010 at 11:09 pm

Tweet Izzie: Hi Demush! How are ya? Democracy: Good Izzie, good… how are you these days? Izzie: Yeah, I’m good, I’m good… Democracy: Listen, I called you in for a meeting to talk about this gag order everybody’s talking about. Izzie: Which gag order? Democracy: Which gag order?! Are you serious? THE gag order, Izzie! […]


Izzie in HolyLand – Part 7

Posted by on March 17, 2010 at 11:40 pm

Tweet It’s 3 am in Jerusalem. Izzie’s just finished another consult with her ministers on how to get out of the mess Eli Yishai caused during the Biden visit. She’s been crying the whole night. Just as she finally begins to close her eyes, the phone rings. Emanuel: Izzie? Izzie: Yes, who is this? Emanuel: […]


Izzie in HolyLand – Part 6

Posted by on February 25, 2010 at 11:05 am

Tweet Izzie: Oh my G-d, Ehud, I’m soooo stoked about Dubai! How cool was that operation? Barak: Yeah, it was pretty good. Izzie: Oh, and that death squad! SOOO smoooooth. Did you check out that Gail Folliard? How hot is THAT chic?! Oh my G-d, it’s like the Mossad must have some kind of Simon […]


Izzie in Holyland – Part 5

Posted by on December 14, 2009 at 8:04 am

Tweet Izzie: Hey Baracky! Barack: Izzie? Is that you? Izzie: Yeah! Baracky, guess what? Barack: Izzie… how many times do I have to tell you, there’s a 7 hour time difference. It’s 3 am here… and, Izzie: But Baracky! I had to call you, I just had to! Barack: Michelle is right next to me […]


Izzie in HolyLand – Part 4

Posted by on September 8, 2009 at 10:35 pm

Tweet (Telephone rings) Izzie: Hello? Barack: Hey Izzie, it’s me… Izzie: Baracky?! Is that you baby? Barack: Yeah, did I wake you? Izzie: It’s OK baby, you can call me anytime… you OK? Barack: Yeah, yeah…. It’s just… Izzie: What… you can tell me… Barack: I dunno. Rahm showed me this piece in Haaretz… Kinda […]